October 30, 2025

How to terrify your investors in 5 words

Halloween is around the corner – but who needs a scary mask when a few words can send chills down an investor’s spine just as efficiently? 👻

This month we are giving a regional spin to Jason Calacanis’s tweet from 2022. We asked several VC folks across MENA to share the phrases that make founders truly terrifying.

How to terrify your investors in 5 words

Who needs Halloween? Founders scare VCs year-round.

We asked a cross-section of MENA VCs: What five words from founders get you spooked?

Before we unveil the results, we put together the crème de la crème of Jason Calanacanis’ “Terrify your investors in 5 words” X thread from 2022:

So what spooks the VC folks in MENA? We spoke to around 10 of them

Here’s the full list:

  • We have a 1-month runway
  • We have a 50-month runway
  • We cut the monthly burn from $140k to $90k (note: MRR has been at $10k, for two years)
  • I’m taking a 3-month sabbatical
  • I’m starting a new business
  • We decided to spin off this business line
  • We have the first-mover’s advantage
  • We are expanding to the Middle East (note: ok, let’s touch base once you’re actually here and it’s no longer an attention-grabbing-only statement)
  • We are expanding to Saudi (note: before reaching any decent traction in the primary market)
  • Our license was withdrawn
  • We’re being investigated by FSRA
  • This is our last resuscitation attempt
  • We are oversubscribed
  • Investors prefer to join at a priced round
  • We are the Uber for…
  • We have no competition
  • B2B2C… what’s the second B?
  • This is a low-hanging fruit
  • I’m profitable, so no need to fundraise
  • We are a YC startup (note: many Y Combinator startups have very high valuations with no/low revenue)
  • We’ll build a good product and customers will come

Also… “Imagine when the founders don’t know each other well or have a strong story,” added Dana Labin, Venture Partner at Leo Capital. She also echoes the last point on our list: “We haven’t tested yet – meaning if the team builds it, clients will come.” Assume demand, build and treat testing as optional. That’s the horror.

“Anything with cheesy FOMO tactics, name-dropping or buzzword soup makes me tune out immediately,” explained Eyad Al Bayouk, Partner-GCC at F6 Ventures.

Well, if you’re looking for a cool VC-themed mask idea, buzzword soup should be on your list. This, too. ;)

See you at /MoneyTech 2025 on Sunday.

Hasan

TL;DR

Do you only have a 1‑month runway? Is the FSRA breathing down your neck? Or are you spinning off a product line? Stop scaring us and save it for Halloween! 👻

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